My name is Becky and I am a classic people pleaser. I’m one of those people pleasers who knows they are a people pleaser and keeps trying to change. Heck, I even wrote a blog post on Ms Mistrys’ Blog on it! I was kinda OK being a people pleaser; it made other people happy and that’s something that makes me happy. But come last November I felt that everyone around me was walking over me and I was in a dark place. Trying to take control of my life and my mental state, I purchased The Life Changing Magic of Not Giving a Fuck by Sarah Knight.
The book focuses on re-evaluating your life that you no longer spend time, money or energy on the things you don’t want too. It’s written cleverly as a paraody of The Life Changing Magic of Tidying by Marie Kondo but, it actually gives you some sound and simple advice in some very simple steps: a) Write down what you don’t want to give a fuck about and b) No longer give a fuck. But, it does deeper than that. Knight helps you sort out your mentally filled place of guilt and things that you don’t want to care and think about it. She also brings the idea of a a ‘Fuck Budget’ and how everyone should manage the fucks they give like how much money they have. I found it’s a truly fabulous way to think about your time and what you care about. Once I worked out what I do care about I was able to spend more time and energy on it.
The best thing I found about the book is that Knight tells you how to not give a toss, but politely. She is constantly saying that it isn’t OK to be an asshole but you can start saying no and still be a well liked, respectful and friendly individual. I hate coming across as an asshole and I truly believe in that manners don’t cost a penny. It was one of the reasons why I struggled with saying ‘No’ so much, because I was worried of what other people thoughts. But in true Sarah Knight fashion – why should I give a fuck?
Despite all the swearing and overuse of the F word in the book I found that someone who didn’t know me giving me the most obvious advice really helped me. Although I’m nowhere near telling people about the things I really, really don’t give two flying figs about; I am saying no to the little things which would cost me money and time. For instance, I declined my works team bonding meal because I didn’t wanna go. It’s only a small step but a massive leap for me.
Have you read the book? Has it helped you?